Dear Red States

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes California, Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty.. You get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq , and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines, 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT. With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia. We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred (until a child is born, then it doesn't much matter) unless we're discussing the war, the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

Finally, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,

Blue States

The E.L.I.T.E. Plan

Come on up! I have plenty of room.

recounts, lawsuits, appeals, oh my!

Ladies, I have a great, great fear I can't shake. It is that Nov 5 we will not know who our next president will be. That if Obama comes out ahead in electoral votes John McCain and his party will demand recounts, file lawsuits and appeals. The thought of this and its effect on the nation's morale and further declining economy will be devastating. But this is a reality that is not beyond imagining. I hope I am wrong.

Alaskans for Obama

Human Obama Logo in Anchorage - Video

29 10 2008

Here is the video from last Saturday’s event in downtown Anchorage! Hundreds of Obama supporters gathered in the freezing cold for over an hour to send this video postcard to their fellow Americans “outside.” Enjoy, and pass it on!

Misses Palin

oh, my. need another nail in the coffin?

Good stuff!

http://palinaspresident.us/

Can't figure a way to embed the image, so just click on the link. Trust me, it's awesome. And highly entertaining.

Genius!

The problem with Sarah Palin isn't that she's stupid (though she may play the part), it's that she's manipulative, controlling, conniving, and power hungry. Some might argue that's the makings of a great politician, but I would argue there should be room for dignity in politics.


From the
Denver Egoist
Attempting to help Denver suck less daily


Uhhhhhh....

We really don’t want to believe she’s as stupid as the Left is painting her, but man she makes it hard.

(For those not catching on: note the scarf)

Investment Advice

I received the following investment advice from a friend who moved from Alaska to Sydney several years ago. Pretty sound advice. A return on your investment AND saving the planet.

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of AIG stock one year ago, it would now be worth $56.91.

With Washington Mutual, you would have $120.36 left of the original $1,000.00

With 'Fannie Mae' (FNM), you would have $11.34 left.

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Lehman Bros one year ago it would now be almost worthless: less than $0.86.

If you had purchased RH Donelley, you would have $45.69 left.

But, if you had purchased $1000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminium recycling refund you would have around $125.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink excessively and then recycle.

Ugh...these people are making me batty!

John McCain compares Barack Obama's policies to socialism

By Bob Drogin and Mark Z. Barabak, Los Angeles Times Staff Writers
1:36 PM PDT, October 18, 2008


Concord, N.C. -- With the presidential campaign entering its final stretch, Republican nominee John McCain today accused Democratic rival Barack Obama of seeking to impose socialist-style economic policies on America. Halfway across the country, Obama drew what appeared to be the largest American crowd of the campaign, an estimated 100,000 people who covered hundreds of yards at a park in downtown St. Louis.

Here in the heart of conservative NASCAR country -- a longtime stronghold for the GOP -- and later in Woodbridge, Va., McCain drew far smaller crowds of several thousand. He used both events to hammer Obama's tax plans as an attempt to "redistribute the wealth" and "just another government give away."

In a national radio address earlier this morning, McCain declared that Obama's policies "sounded a lot like socialism" and amounted to a "phony tax cut."

"At least in Europe, the socialist leaders who so admire my opponent are upfront about their objectives," he said.

McCain's language was striking because Republicans have portrayed Democrats for decades as liberals who favor 1960s-style big government solutions to national challenges, such as poverty and health care.

Socialist theory is more radical, and arguably more sinister to American ears. It calls for collective ownership of most private enterprise and the creation of an egalitarian society. Karl Marx argued that socialism was a transitional phase between capitalism and communism.

Ironically, the Bush administration's emergency $700-billion bailout of major banks and other troubled financial institutions involves the kind of government ownership of private institutions that Socialists favor. Both McCain and Obama voted for the rescue package, which aims to shore up the credit markets and stabilize the economy.

Obama fired back at McCain while in Missouri, another battleground state that is leaning toward the Democrats. As he has in the past, he accused McCain of distorting his tax proposals.

"Under my plan, if you make less than $250,000 a year, which includes 98% of small business owners, you won't see your taxes increase one single dime," Obama said. "Not your payroll taxes, not your income taxes, not your capital gains taxes, nothing."

McCain wants to cut taxes for "folks making out like bandits, some literally," Obama said to a roar from the massive crowd at the foot of the Gateway Arch. "I want to cut taxes, cut the taxes of 95% of all workers."

Obama did not directly answer McCain's use of the term "socialism," but focused on a portion of the Republican's radio address in which he suggested Obama would "convert the IRS into a giant welfare agency, redistributing massive amounts of wealth at the direction of politicians in Washington."

"He must be the first politician in history to call a tax cut for working people 'welfare,' " the Illinois senator said. The only welfare proposal, Obama added, was McCain's plan "to give another $200 billion in tax cuts to the wealthiest companies in America."

The Democrat was referring to McCain's plan to make permanent the tax cuts enacted under President Bush. Obama would allow those cuts to expire, as Congress intended when it passed them. McCain argues that letting the cuts expire amounts to a tax hike.

McCain's rally in the Cabarrus Arena and Event Center, 20 miles from Charlotte, reflected mounting Republican worries in North Carolina. Obama has launched a full-on assault in the state, hoping that a huge turnout of newly registered voters and other supporters will swamp the state's conservative traditions.

Significantly, McCain did not mention Sen. Elizabeth Dole or any other statewide GOP candidate seeking office this year. Dole, caught in a reelection fight, did not attend the event.

Instead, McCain focused chiefly on Obama's exchange last weekend with Samuel J. Wurzelbacher -- now better known as Joe the Plumber -- a blue-collar voter in Holland, Ohio, who had told the Democrat that he hopes to buy his boss' business. "Your new tax plan is going to tax me more, isn't it?" Wurzelbacher asked.

Obama responded that the marginal tax rate would increase from 36% to 39% for businesses that earn more than $250,000, restoring rates used prior to the Bush administration.

"Right now, everybody's so pinched that business is bad for everybody, and I think when you spread the wealth around, it's good for everybody," Obama added.

McCain cited that "spread the wealth" exchange with Wurzelbacher during Wednesday's presidential debate and every day since to paint Obama as hostile to small business and working families.

Republican campaign aides hope the growing focus on Wurzelbacher will invigorate McCain's underdog effort, much as his surprise choice of Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin as his running mate provided a crucial jolt of support in early September.

McCain's campaign distributed hand-painted signs at the rally today, and supporters seated in the bleachers, in view of TV cameras, waved "Fight for Joe the Plumber," "I'm Joe the Plumber" and "Don't Take Joe the Plumber's $$$."

Please Sarah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6OsGjelmbo

Why Sarah Palin should be less than pleased by the results of the report

from THE ATLANTIC

by Conor Clarke

Troopergate

Sarah Palin's response to Friday's Troopergate report—which found that she had violated Alaska's Executive Branch Ethics Law in firing Public Safety Commisioner Walter Monegan—has been a brilliant one-two punch of putting on the happy face and throwing down the gauntlet. Step one is to chirpily deny the obvious: "I'm very, very pleased to be cleared of any legal wrongdoing, any hint of any kind of unethical activity there. Very pleased to be cleared of any of that," she told reporters on Saturday. Step two is a public challenge: "If you read the report you'll see that there was nothing unlawful or unethical about replacing a cabinet member," she told reporters on the same day. "You gotta read the report."

The report is 263 pages long, and Sarah Palin neither wants nor expects anyone to read it. Unable to get the best of Alaskan investigators, she is trying to get the best of American reading habits. For all I know this might succeed. All I can say is that I ruined my weekend and took her challenge, and I did not arrive at page 263 with the impression that Palin should be pleased—much less "very, very pleased"—about the results of the report.

Sarah Palin fired her public safety commissioner in part because the commissioner refused to sack the ex-husband of Palin's sister, following a rocky and possibly violent divorce. That's the first and central finding of the report. Palin is lying outright when she claims the report found nothing "unethical." The report states very clearly and very early that she violated Alaska's Executive Branch Ethics Act, which says that a public officer's attempt to "benefit a personal or financial interest" is a violation of the public trust. The best you can say for her is that she's only spinning when she claims that the report found nothing "unlawful," since the state Constitution says that cabinet members can be fired for any reason at all—including, presumably, insufficient enthusiasm for hockey or aerial wolf hunting.

But the McCain campaign's debate over nomenclature—unethical, illegal, and unlawful—seems like a bizarrely punctilious exercise in missing the point. Those categories will matter when the Alaska legislature decides, weeks from now, what to do with the Troopergate report. But for the next two weeks the only adjective the McCain campaign needs to worry about is "unelectable," and we can determine whether that adjective applies without worrying about whether Palin's activities were illegal, or unlawful, or illicit, or whatever. No one is claiming they qualify her for the vice presidency.

In support of its contention that Palin acted unethically, the report cites 18 separate events in which Palin, her husband Todd, or one of her employees put pressure on Public Safety Commissioner Walter Monegan to fire Trooper Michael Wooten, the ex-husband of Palin's sister. Of these my favorite is an occasion in fall of 2007 in which Wooten "was seen [by Todd Palin] dropping off one of his children at school" in his patrol car. Palin called Wooten's supervisor and complained in the hopes of getting him fired. Months later a top Palin aide saw Wooten "driving around the Good Shepherd Church early in the morning dropping off one of his kids in a marked patrol vehicle." The aide also called and complained. Both calls were made in the fervent hope that dropping children at school or church in one's work vehicle was a sackable offense. And on both occasions it was found that Trooper Wooten had obtained permission to drop off his kids.

The McCain campaign tries gamely to put the law-and-order spin on this sort of thing by noting that the Palin family was "Understandably concerned about a pattern of behavior demonstrated by someone entrusted with the responsibilities of law enforcement," and thus "reported the behavior to the appropriate authorities." Nice try. Perhaps the Palins really thought Trooper Wooten was a threat to Alaska's first family and an embarrassment to the state, but if you're afraid of someone it's probably not a great idea to hang around outside the school to understand the manner in which he drops off the offspring.

The obvious upshot of the report is that Sarah and Todd Palin wanted Wooten fired not out of fear but because of the messy divorce. This matters to me in part because she violated an ethics statute, but mostly because I don't want a vice president who is petty and vindictive.

Perhaps I'm wrong about the facts of the case. The McCain campaign's own analysis of the firing says that "Emails show a pattern of Mr. Monegan refusing to take administration direction and ignoring attempts by members of Governor Palin's staff to reach a working consensus on budgetary issues." Maybe that's true, but Palin seems to have little interest in proving it. She did not provide a sworn statement to the Troopergate investigation, and the report makes clear that Palin's attorney general, citing executive privilege, did not hand over 209 emails related to the Monegan firing, a hold-up for which "No satisfactory reason or explanation has been given." Maybe mavericks don't need to give explanations, but I'm pretty sure vice presidents do.

sigh

I won't ruin this with interjecting my own praise for it. The article stands on its own.

Garrison Keillor: Let the leader lead

By Garrison Keillor

Published: October 16, 2008

The Scripture reading in church Sunday gave me a jolt - Exodus 32, which refers to the Chosen People wearing earrings, men as well as women, and I twitched when the lector read it. Yikes! Moses got his ears pierced? What else didn't we know???

And then a bigger jolt. God is so furious at the C.P. for worshiping the golden calf (forged from their earrings) that He talks about consuming them with fire, but Moses talks Him out of it, which sort of dents one's faith in divine omniscience, does it not, the Lord taking a sharp turn like that? ("Oh, I hadn't thought about that - O.K., cancel the thunderbolt!")

But I didn't jump up in my pew and point this out - we like to keep things moving along in church, recite the Creed, confess our sins, pass the plate, sing the doxology, not stop for questions along the way - so I just brood over it, as I do about more and more these days. Walk at night down misty streets through yellow leaves and question everything and keep it to myself.

I let other people carry the conversational ball when it comes to religion, or politics.

I've known enough old bores to want not to be one of them. Old honkers with ratchety voices who hold everyone hostage and make their point 16 times and lay waste to the dinner hour.

Not me, dear hearts. As I write this, the sun is coming up over the Mississippi Valley, and in the orange swashes at the horizon is a long string of clouds that one could imagine are mountains.

It rises on people facing challenges far beyond anything I've known in my rackety life. A beautiful, cheerful woman of 26 has been handed a jagged diagnosis of cancer like a big, wet albatross on a necklace. A friend struggles with severe depression, slogging through the day, wishing the meds would kick in.

And then there is Patrick, whom I met on Saturday, a very bright boy who lies speechless on a gurney, a trach tube in his windpipe, a pump humming softly on a shelf below. His parents explain that he was stricken by a rare neuromuscular disease and that's all they say about that. They're both animated, buoyant, jokey, and Patrick smiles and raises his eyebrows - and suddenly one's own tiny troubles aren't worth mentioning.

The existence of human suffering seems to me to affirm the Christian faith. It's the sacred duty of the faithful to uphold the Patricks of the world and their heroic parents against the prevailing Darwinist forces, but a Patrick shouldn't be asked to sit by the roadside waiting for a kindly Christian motorist to stop - he is entitled to mercy as a basic human right, and it is merciful of Christians to expect government to carry out this duty.

The safety net has become seriously frayed, as the parents of the Patricks of America know very well, and now the sun has risen on an October day of pure blue sky and yellow and red boughs raised against it, and the day must be acknowledged. What a gorgeous life we lead, here in this gaudy forest, the smell of smoke and apples in the air, and three weeks to go before the election.

The American people are poised to do something that could not be imagined 10 years ago, or even five, which is to vote for the best man regardless of his skin color and elect him president.

The campaign against him is not one that anybody will point to with pride in years to come. It is a long trail of honking and flapping and traces of green slime, as if a flock of geese had taken up residence in the front yard.

But Barack's cool poise in the face of blather is some sort of testament to American heart and humor. The man has walked tall and his wife has turned out to be the brightest figure in the whole political parade, an ebullient woman of quick wit and beautiful spirit.

Bravo, Michelle.

Onward, America. We've all seen plenty of the worst - the sly cruelty, the arrogant ignorance, the fascination with trivia, the cheats, the weaselish and piggish and the buzzardly - but we can rise above it if we will only recognize a leader when one comes along and have the sense to let him lead.

Garrison Keillor is the author of a new Lake Wobegon novel, "Liberty."

Flagged as inappropriate

So, I was just perusing some of the more conservative corners of the internet tubes and read the following post-debate review on the Christian Science Monitor site. The comments are the most interesting part... most "lean" toward Obama. But the MOST interesting thing to note is that nearly all of those comments have at least one or two flags as inappropriate. Interesting. And several have been removed by the admin. Very interesting. Glad both sides of the discussion are respected...

After debate, mixed reaction to McCain and a tilt toward Obama’s policies

Dante Chinni

Posted: 10.16.2008 / 7:47 AM EDT

After three presidential debates and one vice presidential meeting, the noise you may have heard Wednesday night at about 10:30 p.m. was a big exhale from across Patchwork Nation. For many voters, the reaction was one of relief that the debates are over.

“I’m certainly glad this is the last debate because I’m so sick of these guys it isn’t even funny,” wrote James Rickman, a Patchwork Nation correspondent in Los Alamos, N.M. – our wealthy “Monied ’Burb.”

Yet the third presidential debate brought some of the fireworks that everyone wanted and probably the most open exchanges between Sens. John McCain and Barack Obama.

Senator McCain brought a pugilistic attitude to the night and took nearly every opportunity to hit at Senator Obama. Most of our correspondents, though, in responses similar to the CNN and CBS flash polls taken after the debate, thought Obama “won.”

McCain turned questions about a number of topics into questions about the Illinois senator. He brought up everything from William Ayers, a Vietnam War-era radical, to comments by Rep. John Lewis (D) of Georgia about McCain’s own rally crowds. He relentlessly brought up “Joe the plumber” – a man Obama apparently met on the campaign trail who he says will be burned by Obama’s policies.

But the responses to McCain’s approach were mixed.

Down in Clermont, Fla. (our aging “Emptying Nest” community), Ann Dupee, a retiree, wrote, “For the first time he came out feisty. Too bad he hasn’t been showing emotion all these months.”

And in Baton Rouge, La. (our heavily African-American “Minority Central” community), Ed Pratt, a media-relations representative for Southern University, wrote that he didn’t think McCain won but that he “was stronger tonight than at the other debates.” Mr. Pratt added, “He was aggressive and tough.”

But another correspondent in Clermont, who asked not to be named due to local sensitivities, was less taken with McCain’s approach. “Senator McCain was often agitated and seemed at times that he was coming unglued,” he wrote.

Out in Lincoln City, Ore. (our lower-income “Service Worker Center”), Patchwork Nation blogger Kip Ward, owner of the local Historic Anchor Inn, wrote that McCain’s approach turned people off. He watched the debate with a half-dozen people at the hotel.

“All felt Obama won hands down,” he wrote in an e-mail. “It doesn’t really matter what either said. Most people will forget most of that by tomorrow. What matters again is that Barack looked cool, and presidential. McCain’s head looked like it was going to pop, his eyes were bulging, and his face was contorting.”

Beyond the theatrics and tone, the back-and-forth about who was associating with whom and why made the debate feel more backward-looking than the others. Correspondents in our communities have not dealt much with such topics in our regular correspondence with them.

But on Wednesday night, the one Patchwork Nation community that did comment about the past – especially Obama’s past – was Nixa, Mo., our socially conservative “Evangelical Epicenter.” There, Kristi Bohannon, owner of a local Sonic fast-food franchise who is a supporter of President Bush, said she and her family decided they were voting for McCain.

“After both debates, we all agreed that Obama has too many associations with individuals of questionable motives and character, and McCain’s life shows he has dedicated his life to serving the USA,” Ms. Bohannon wrote. “None of us agree or disagree with everything either of them said. The choice we make will come down to character of the individual.”

For Bohannon, and probably many others in “Evangelical Epicenters,” the question of “character” leads to McCain. In other communities with other priorities, it leads to Obama.

But with the economy weighing heavily on people’s minds, many people in our communities seem more interested in policy. From Eagle, Colo. (our growing and diversifying “Boom Town”), to Los Alamos to Baton Rouge, people cited Obama’s emphasis on specific policy plans as key for them.

And in the policy prescriptions from both sides, the larger themes tend to be Democratic, argued Robert Goidel, a Patchwork Nation blogger and professor at Louisiana State University in Baton Rouge.

“Even if McCain were to somehow win, the Democrats have won,” Professor Goidel wrote. “What I mean by this is the conversation is no longer ‘ending welfare as we know it’ or ‘government is the problem not the solution.’ The question is – what can government do to address a failing economy, a health care system that needs reform, and a world that is no longer at our command.”

Some of the strongest issues for the GOP in the past 20-plus years have involved the restraining of government. In an election where Wall Street is shaking and where people are talking about the possibility of another “Great Depression,” those arguments may have lost much of their power with voters.

Would the real Sarah Palin please stand up?

Palin look-alikes can't pass on guns, moose trip

BLUES CENTRAL: The weekly contest will end Oct. 29.

By DEBRA McKINNEY
dmckinney@adn.com

Published: October 13th, 2008 11:40 PM
Last Modified: October 13th, 2008 11:48 PM

It was another round of the Todd and Sarah Palin Look-Alike Contest, and while the first week drew 17 Sarahs and two Todds, you could have counted this night's contenders on one hand and still had enough fingers left to clutch the throat of an ice-cold bottle of Bud.

Three Sarahs and nary a Todd.

"Now all you guys, if you have facial hair, if you sign up you're going to the finals," contest instigator Bob Lester told the crowd at Blues Central. "If you're a chick with facial hair, you can be Todd Palin at this point."

The "Bob" of KWHL's "Bob and Mark" morning show even tried talking Wicked Wanda, the club's 70-something bouncer, into being a Todd.

No takers.

But there's still plenty of time to get in touch with your inner Palin. The contest continues this Wednesday and next, with each week's winners advancing to the finals Oct. 29.

Grand prize is a guided moose hunting trip and a rifle, one for the Sarah, one for the Todd. And beaucoup beer for the both of them.

"Plus you get immortalized on a Jones Soda with your picture on the label and everything," Lester told the crowd. "The 'Sour Palin' and the 'Todd Pa-lime.' "

Sarah and the Pitbulls, a band that threw itself together specifically for the contest, opens this weekly gov-love fest, which has drawn interest from "Inside Edition," "Entertainment Today," "Fox News," the CBC and others, according to Blues Central manager, Bob Winn. The band's singer, Joanna Papasodora, is a sizzling Sarah in terrifying stiletto heels and a black dress tight enough to do lung damage. The band is her Secret Service detail, in black suits, white shirts, black ties, dark glasses and wires sprouting from their ears.

As for the contest, it's not just about looking the part. Contestants also compete in the talent portion by answering or evading questions.

One round of Sarahs -- Renee Carroll, Ilene Staten and Toni Pientka -- took questions like these from Rebel Blues front man Rob Woolsey:

"Could you please spell and define 'doctrine?' "

"No."

"Read any good magazines lately?"

"Yes. I really enjoy People and Us."

"How do you feel about your recent interview with Katie Couric?

"I was not there."

"No, mama, you weren't."

Staten and Pientka, flight attendants for the Conoco Phillips charter between Anchorage and Prudhoe Bay, said Staten didn't do anything special to look like Sarah.

"This is me," Staten said. "Right here. These are my real glasses."

People were noting the resemblance long before pit bulls started painting their lips "At least five or 10 passengers a day will say, 'Oh my gosh, you look like Sarah Palin. Can I be your bodyguard?' "

SO MANY SARAHS

By comparison to subsequent rounds, the first night of the contest had a Sarah surplus.

"We had every kind of Sarah you could imagine," said Winn. "Tall, short, wide, thin. Some more provocative than others. If you had a Sarah fantasy, it would have been there."

The basic Sarah recipe contains three ingredients: the hair, the glasses, the suit.

Sarah-contender Kris Doughty, an Anchorage legal assistant and student, needed help in the hair department, and found it on U-Tube by Googling "Sarah Palin's hair."

Christina Mulneaux, owner of a Wasilla floral shop, went the professional hairdresser route. But first she had a big decision to make.

"Cut bangs or not, cut bangs or not."

She's not crazy about bangs, but she cut them anyway for the chance to win a moose hunting trip for her husband.

Janet Metzner is the barbed-wire Barbie in the band Alaskan Barby & the Kendolls. She played her Sarah with a Barby twist, as summed up by the lyrics of her theme song:

I'm an Alaskan Girl with my big attitude

I wear jeans, t-shirts and my combat boots

If I want your lip I can scrape it off my shoe

If I want your opinion I'll beat it out of you

Whitney LaRose flew up from Kenai to be Sarah for the night, a move entirely out of character. She's a surgeon's assistant at Central Peninsula Hospital, a mother of three who goes to bed at 8:30 at night.

It was the list of prizes that seduced her.

"I mean, I love guns," she said. "And I want to go on a guided moose hunt. My kids were more excited, 'Oh you get your name on a Jones Soda!' I was like, 'What's a Jones Soda?' "

Once LaRose told friends and co-workers, it became a community project.

"One girl brought in a black skirt for me. Another girl brought a red jacket. And I had another meet me at the airport with panty hose because I don't own any panty hose."

The airport was a scene. People kept staring at her, whispering and pulling out their cell phones. And on the plane, as eyes followed, she went for some empty seats in the back only, to be followed by a guy who jumped at the chance to sit next to Sarah Palin.

She took a taxi to Blues Central, walked in with her overnight bag, took a seat at the end of the bar and asked herself, "What am I doing here?"

She was first on the list and first on stage.

Adrenaline saved her. Asked about energy policy or some such thing, it was like she started channeling the real thing.

"We need to drill, drill, drill!" she shouted, punching the air.

The crowd went wild.

"Sar-ah! Sar-ah! Sar-ah!" they chanted.

LaRose isn't sure what came over her that night.

Wait a minute. Yes she does.

"I just wanted to win that rifle."

With age comes wisdom

106-year-old voter chooses Obama

By David Willey

BBC News, Rome

Sister Cecilia has lived in the convent in Rome for 50 years

A 106-year-old American nun living in a convent in Rome could well be the oldest person to vote in the 2008 US Presidential election.

Sister Cecilia Gaudette, who last voted for President Eisenhower in 1952, has registered to vote and says she will vote for Democrat Barack Obama.

Although hard of hearing, she keeps herself informed by reading newspapers and watching TV at the convent.

"I'm encouraged by Senator Obama," she says.

"I've never met him, but he seems to be a good man with a good private life. That's the first thing. Then he must be able to govern," she adds.

Sitting in her modest office in the convent where she has lived for the past 50 years, the diminutive nun appears uninterested in the row inside the American Catholic church over Senator Obama's support for pro-choice policies on abortion.

Asked about her hopes for the US under an Obama presidency, she says: "Peace abroad. I don't worry about the Iraq war because I can't do anything about it. Lord knows how it will end."

"It is very complicated," she said. "Those Eastern people are not like we are."

But despite taking part in the 4 November election, Sister Cecilia does not intend to return to the US.

"I have no plans for the future. I am too old to go back to the US. Life has changed too much."

But she still watches "very important events" on TV. The election comes under this category.

OMG! You're such a good debater!

Facebook isn't completely pointless... after all, a friend's page directed me to this post. : )

It comes from this guy's blog: http://www.adennak.com/blog/wordpress/

LOVE those internet tubes!

Speaking of... I wonder how the Senator Stevens' trial is going. I read somewhere a couple days ago that there was a chance they were going to dismiss all charges. Naturally. Couldn't possibly prosecute Uncle Ted now could we. GAWD Alaskan politics are f'd.

Bios

I just received my absentee ballot in the mail today (woohoo!) and I'm reading through the Voter's Pamphlet... for fun.

Here are the bios for the top 2 tickets - Democratic and Republican (btw, there are a total of 8 presidential candidates on my ballot).

I found a few things to be very interesting. Compare the education of the two tickets - if that makes Obama/Biden elite then I'm all for elitism. I'm not sure why, but I also find interesting the lack of detail in the description of family for the McCain/Palin camp... for the party of good ol' family values they don't seem that proud of their families - at least not enough to even name them. And lastly, how is it that the person with the least amount of national/international experience and exposure has the most to say about significant career experience?


Barack Obama
Current Occupation/Employer: US Senator
Education: Graduated from Columbia University and Harvard Law School where he was elected President of the Harvard Law Review by his fellow students
Elected Experience: Served 8 years as Illinois State Senator; Currently a US Senator
Family: Senator Obama and his wife Michelle are proud parents of two daughters, Sasha, 7 and Malia, 10.
Significant Career Experience: Two decades ago, Senator Obama walked away from a career on Wall Street to work as a community organizer where he helped rebuild communities devastated by plant closings. He went on to become a civil rights lawyer and a Constitutional Law Professor at the University of Chicago.

Joe Biden
Current Occupation/Employer: US Senator
Education: Graduated from the University of Delaware and Syracuse University Law School.
Elected Experience: New Castle County Councilman (Delaware), currently a US Senator.
Family: Married to Jill Jacobs and has three grown children: Beau, Hunter and Ashley. Beau currently serves as Delaware's Attorney General; a captain in the 261st Signal Brigade of the Delaware National Guard, he will be deployed to Iraq this October. Ashley is a social worker and Hunter is an attorney. He also has five grandchildren: Naomi, Finnegan, Roberta Mabel, Natalie and Robert Hunter.
Significant Career Experience: Attorney, county councilman, and constitutional law professor.


John McCain
Current Occupation/Employer: US Senator
Education: Graduate of the U.S. Naval Academy
Elected Experience: US House of Representatives; US Senate
Family: Wife Cindy; seven children
Significant Career Experience: Naval Aviator; Navy Liaison to US Senate.

John McCain has a remarkable record of leadership and has always put our country first. He has been a consistent leader in the fight to reform Washington, eliminate wasteful government spending and lower taxes. John McCain will also continue his fight to achieve strategic energy independence from foreign oil and get our economy back on track.

Sarah Palin
Current Occupation/Employer: Governor of Alaska
Education: The University of Idaho.
Elected Experience: Governor of Alaska; Mayor of Wasilla
Family: Husband Todd; five children
Significant Career Experience: During her first legislative session, Governor Palin's administration passed two major pieces of legislation - an overhaul of the state's ethic laws and a competitive process to construct a gas pipeline. She created Alaska's Petroleum Systems Integrity Office to provide oversight and maintenance of oil and gas equipment, facilities and infrastructure, and the Clime Change Subcabinet to prepare a climate change strategy for Alaska. She serves as Chair of the Oil & Gas Compact Commission and Chair of the National Governors Association Natural Resources Committee.

Stuff

You may have seen this already, but there's a great video at The Story of Stuff web site that talks about consumerism. Hopefully if one good thing comes from the significant downturn of the global economy, it's taking a look at the consumers we've become in the last 50 years.

What is the Story of Stuff?

From its extraction through sale, use and disposal, all the stuff in our lives affects communities at home and abroad, yet most of this is hidden from view. The Story of Stuff is a 20-minute, fast-paced, fact-filled look at the underside of our production and consumption patterns. The Story of Stuff exposes the connections between a huge number of environmental and social issues, and calls us together to create a more sustainable and just world. It'll teach you something, it'll make you laugh, and it just may change the way you look at all the stuff in your life forever.

What do you read?

Maybe Katie Couric could have sent Sarah Palin this list to choose from...

1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people
who run the country.

2.The Washington Post is read by people who think
they run the country.

3.The New York Times is read by people who think
they should run the country and who are very good at
crossword puzzles.

4.USA Today is read by people who think they ought
to run the country but don't really understand The New
York Times. They do, however, like their statistics
shown in pie charts.

5.The Los Angeles Times is read by people who
wouldn't mind running the country - if they could find
the time - and if they didn't have to leave LA to do
it.

6.The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents
used to run the country and did a far superior job of
it, thank you very much.

7.The New York Daily News is read by people who
aren't too sure who is running the country and don't
really care as long as they can get a seat on the
train.

8.The New York Post is read by people who don't care
who's running the country as long as they do something
really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.

9.The Miami Herald is read by people who are running
another country but need the baseball scores.

10.The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who
aren't sure there is a country, or that anyone is
running it but, if so, they oppose all that they stand
for. There are occasional
exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority gay
feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal
aliens from any other country or galaxy provided, of
course, that they are not Republicans.

11.The National Enquirer is read by people trapped
in line at the grocery store.

BUT
12. None of these is read by the guy who is running
the country!

Hey Sarah Palin

"Hey Sarah Palin" T-shirt is at http://skreened.com/blukoi/hey-sarah-palin

A kindred spirit

From the Huffington Post

by Daniel Chun
Posted October 6, 2008 | 11:36 AM (EST)

The Case For Insanity

Three weeks ago, I met with a therapist for the first time in my life. I'm a very happy guy -- great family, great job, great girlfriend, tons of Facebook friends -- no problems that a glass of scotch couldn't fix. But ever since the beginning of September, I've gone 100% batshit crazy. Why? Because come next year, John McCain and Sarah Palin might be running this country. I can't concentrate at work. I can't hold a normal conversation about anything besides politics. At night, I'm afraid to go to sleep because I know that Sarah Palin is waiting for me in Dreamland, like Freddy Krueger but dumber and more evil.

I was hoping the therapist would listen to me lay out this situation, nod sagely, and hand me a bucket full of pills with a creepy name like "Uplift" or "Happiness 4000." But what he told me, surprisingly, was "Get more involved."

"Haven't you been listening, you dumb shit?" I thought as I smiled and asked him to elaborate. But what he said made sense: by getting more involved, I'd spend more time talking with like-minded, highly capable people. I'd feel like I was helping Obama directly. And I'd have less time to be furious at Steve Schmidt.

So I got more involved. I made phone calls to voters in my hometown in Pennsylvania. I donated. I signed up to canvass in Nevada. I set up a fundraising page on Obama's website with two friends. We set an ambitious goal of $10,000. After two weeks of bugging and pleading with our friends, family, co-workers, and bosses, we had raised $26,000.

But as satisfying as all those things are, I'm still crazy. And the more I think about it, the more I think that everyone should be crazy. Consider all the meaningless shit that we become obsessed about -- ex-girlfriends, neighbors' dogs, celebrities' vaginas -- and now think about this: a 72-year old liar with anger problems might become the most powerful person in the world. And if he dies, he'd be replaced by a babbling, evolution-doubting, Supreme-Court-case-not-knowing woman whose knowledge about the world comes from a 3-week cram session. This deserves one month of your obsession.

Think about how proud you would be to have Barack Obama as your President. How proud you'd be that you're an American. If John McCain wins after what we've been through these last eight years, we'd be telling the entire world that we're perfectly content with being hated and ridiculed. We'd be Pam Anderson who dumps Tommy Lee, complains about wanting to find a nice guy, and starts dating Kid Rock.

The contrast between Obama and McCain could not be greater. This is like choosing between an orgasm and a punch in the throat. The fact this is a close race is a terrifying outrage, and every single person should be doing everything they can about it. Stop clicking refresh on Mark Halperin's The Page. Go knock on some doors. Make some phone calls. Make a donation. Recruit your friends. You only have to do it for a month. This shit makes a difference, and with the country in such a bad way, the stakes could not be higher. If you aren't going crazy, there's something wrong with you.

Match-o-Matic 2

Enjoy!

http://abcnews.go.com/politics/MatchoMatic/fullpage?id=5542139

SEC. 503. EXEMPTION FROM EXCISE TAX FOR CERTAIN WOODEN ARROWS DESIGNED FOR USE BY CHILDREN.

It's stunning really... and I'm not even sure where to begin. But the $700 billion Wall Street "bail out" package that passed last week and was hastily signed into law is another fine example of the bullshit that takes place in our government every day.

I subscribe to a magazine here in Canada called Playback. It's a production industry publication and I receive daily emails with headlines and links to articles. I rarely read through it but occasionally a headline will catch my attention, as one did this morning. Try to overcome the error in the first sentence. The article isn't really my reason for venting but the text is below...

What I find so upsetting, yet sadly not surprising, is all the bullshit that was piled onto this bill (television production included of course) to make the lobbyists happy, and so that the inept politicians would pass it. Not that I'm really convinced it should have passed or that it will make a positive difference anyway... but it's worth glancing at some of the details if you have time.

If you have a free afternoon, here's a link to the full text of the bill: http://www.govtrack.us/congress/billtext.xpd?bill=h110-1424

The bit about television production is in TITLE V--ADDITIONAL TAX RELIEF AND OTHER TAX PROVISIONS, SEC. 502. PROVISIONS RELATED TO FILM AND TELEVISION PRODUCTIONS if anyone really cares.

It's really Section 503 that caught my eye. And all I have to say is WTF?

Wonder if the Chinese will take civilians into space soon... I think I'd like to move to another planet.

Bailout could stifle service work

by: Etan Vlessing Oct 3, 2008

The current Wall Street meltdown and $700-million bank bailout by Washington could either help Hollywood film and TV projects find their way to Canada, or hinder them.

It depends on whether you're shooting in New York City or Los Angeles.

The economic crisis on Wall Street could be good news for Canada, as New York state is considering shrinking its tax incentives for local film and TV producers to deal with expected revenue shortfalls.

New York Governor David Paterson on Friday told a press conference his state faces an "economic bloodbath," and urged the State Legislature to meet in a special session to tackle a growing deficit.

New York has drawn a slew of production from Hollywood, including ABC's Ugly Betty, by tripling its tax break for all below-the-line production costs spent in the Empire State from 10% to 30%. New York City also introduced a 5% bonus to halt siphoning of work to neighboring states or Canada.

But with New York getting hammered by projected lost jobs and revenue from the economic crisis on Wall Street, the talk is local politicians will look to scale back generous incentives for Hollywood to plug budget holes during a slowing economy.

Under the current incentives regime to run to 2013, the state will hand out $65 million in tax credits to local producers in 2008, $75 million in 2009, $85 million in 2010, $90 million in 2011 and 2012, and $110 million in 2013.

It is understood that no decisions will be made until after the Nov. 4 U.S. election, but the proposal on the table is to scale back New York state's tax liability for local movie and TV shoots in the coming years to divert funds to more needy sectors of the economy.

Whether Canada -- and specifically Ontario and Quebec to the north -- will benefit from New York state's travails is uncertain because the earlier Writers Guild of America strike, and now the prospect of labor action by the Screen Actors Guild, has upended Hollywood's production schedules.

Now the bad news for Canada. The $700-billion bailout of Wall Street banks -- approved by the U.S. Congress on Friday and signed into law that afternoon by President Bush -- contains some unexpected tax breaks for Hollywood producers that keep their movie and TV shoots at home, and don't take them abroad to Canada or elsewhere.

Hollywood producers that keep projects with budgets of less than $15 million in the U.S. -- which excludes blockbuster studio shoots -- are expected to receive $470 million in tax breaks over 10 years.

U.S. presidential candidate Barack Obama has long played the anti-outsourcing card during his run for the White House by urging no more tax breaks for companies that ship jobs overseas and more for those that invest in the U.S. market.

The surprise is it was assumed that Obama was talking more about General Motors and Microsoft, and moving jobs to China and India, than about Hollywood and its foreign location shoots in Canada or elsewhere abroad.

The Great Schlep

The Great Schlep from The Great Schlep on Vimeo.

Genius.

http://thegreatschlep.com/site/index.html